7 Things That Happen When You Go On A Social Media Cleanse

To go on a social media cleanse for a week is not everybody’s cuppa tea! It needs strength of will and character, and a really messed up mind for one to dare take up such a purifying task. 

So a week back, someone (read, someone special) I have taken a liking to did a brutal turnaround, and my peace of mind fell victim to a game of Russian 'Love' Roulette! I yearned for a comfortable place to wallow in and some dusting of ‘inner peace’! So I took to a week-long cleanse—a social media cleanse! 

But then starts the side effects. Here’s a few to be warned of.

1. Your fingers start twitching desperately. 

     

    Your fingers be like a druggie without your smartphone. You start missing the smooth touch of your 'smart ass' phone!

2. Notifications desert you.

You want to dismiss Bae! So you look forward to your bros and chickas to pump you up, between bouts of 'leave-me-alone-for-heaven's-sake' mode. But dammit! there's no scope for notifications. You are just left to syncing your email a dozen times in a minute. Self-esteem plummets at it's lowest low. 'I-am-not-important-enough' mode is on.

3. You become a sad, but creepy stalker.

You hope for crush to miss you, but there are no messages or calls! You are clueless. You roundly end up stalking your crush online (incognito mode). All social accounts stalked at least five times a day.

4. Dangers of drunk texting!

When you can't get enough of stalking your crush, you drunk text your crush! Well because all the other modes of stalking are just plain useless.

5. On the plus side, you get to eat warm food!

Social media absence accounts for zero fancy food photographs and the no risk of drool dripping out of your mouth. You enjoy lots of scrumptious satisfying meals that are eaten while still warm.

6. You undergo Selfie-withdrawal Complex.

A rather difficult problem, but you slowly start realising how much your skulking personality, racoon eyes and mopey looks are bad recipes for selfies. What do you do when your membership of the selfie nursery (social media platforms) have been taken away. You go to a shrink to get over 'selfie-withdrawal complex'.

7. The Epiphanic moment — Life is okay without Memes 

You suddenly realize the lame ass memes on social media are half as funny as the amazeball funny friends you have. You wonder how did you miss this for so long!